“When one door closes, another opens;
but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door
that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”
- Alexander Graham Bell

Jenna playing soccer

Some of the greatest lessons that a person can learn about life and leadership comes from playing sports.

It’s on the playing field that we discover how important it is to have a positive attitude, be a team player, and give 100% effort.  There is also an inherent risk of injury, defeat, and disappointment when it comes to playing sports. How we handle those challenges and what we learn from them can help us not only grow as an athlete but more importantly as a person.

Jenna, a student-athlete at Essex High School in Essex, VT knows this first hand. Going into her senior year she was captain of her soccer team and the season ahead was full of promise. During a preseason game in one play Jenna tore her left ACL, cracked her kneecap and cracked her femur bone. Her season was over – and for someone who lived and breathed soccer – Jenna was devastated.

She now had to face one of the biggest challenges an athlete can be confronted with – dealing with a season-ending injury.

I asked Jenna how she handled this setback and what she did to turn such a painful experience into something positive. Her lessons and insights may not only make a difference for athletes but for anyone confronted with an unexpected turn of events.

It’s Okay to be disappointed, sad, frustrated and even angry.

It can be a shock to learn that you cannot finish your season or possibly ever play again. Give yourself the time to process the upset. It’s okay to be disappointed, sad, frustrated and even angry at first. The best thing for parents, friends, family and coaches to do is to bring as much understanding and compassion to the situation as possible.

When you’re dealing with a student athlete who has a passion and love for the game and has spent their whole life playing a sport and then has a season-ending injury, the last thing they want to hear initially is ‘you’ll bounce back from this’. Just listen and let a little time pass.

Set new goals

Redefine your role and focus

Once you have had time to process the disappointment, it’s important to re-frame this experience and focus on what you can control and contribute to your team. In this case, Jenna asked herself, “although I can’t be a leader on the field, what can I do from the sidelines as a captain/leader/teammate to help my team?”

Examples include: spending extra time after practice with a player who is struggling with their shot or helping a player with their dribbling. It could include taking the time to have 1-on-1 conversations with some of the players and letting them know what a great job they’re doing, encouraging them to do their best. By being engaged in the game and encouraging her teammates Jenna was able to “not get caught up in the past and what could have been.”

Create new opportunities

Student athletes can sometimes define themselves as just a “soccer player” or a “basketball player” and lose sight of the bigger picture. When you are faced with a season-ending injury it causes you to see that you are much more than just the sport that you play. You have other talents and have the choice to start setting new goals and create new opportunities.  For example, you may find that after going to physical therapy to recover from your injury that you now want to get into sports medicine.

Keeping the passion for the game

Just because you can no longer play your sport does not mean you cannot be a part of it. You could get into coaching, become a sports broadcaster, or even work for a professional team in public relations.

The point is the love and passion for the game does not have to go away, you just might have to walk through another door to find it.

What have you learned in dealing with a season-ending injury? Share in the comment box below or connect with me on Facebook and Twitter.

Life Lessons from a Season-Ending Injury is a post from: Copyright 2010 Ed Gerety's Dream Big Blog

My 5 year old son Ryan learned to ride his bike without training wheels this past weekend. I am not sure if he will remember the moment, but it is one that my wife Suzanne and I will never forget.

The morning of the big event I asked Ryan, “Is today the day you are ready to take the training wheels off of your bike?” His reply was “Yeah, I think so, I am five-and-a-half now.” After that reply he then followed up with a series of questions.

“Dad, what if I fall down?”

I answered, “Ryan, if you fall that’s okay because we all fall down when we try something new, the important thing is to get back up and try it again.”

“Will you and mom be behind me?” he asked.

“Yes, we will be right behind you but at some point we will have to let you go and you have to trust that you will find your balance.”

“How fast will I be able to go?” he said.

“You will want to take it slow at first but as you get more confident and more experience you can go as fast as you want.”

As we watched him pedal down the driveway with his new found freedom I realized that finding your balance in life is not always easy and you can learn a lot from teaching a little boy how to find it on a bicycle for the first time.

Finding your Balance is a post from: Copyright 2010 Ed Gerety's Dream Big Blog

I am at Niagara Falls on the Canadian border side. These waterfalls are the most powerful waterfalls in North America. As I stood and watched the power and beauty of the falls I noticed how they always seemed to be changing. Each wave of water that came crashing down was different and took their own path to the jagged rocks below. It made me think of the famous quote by Heraclitus, a 500 BC Greek philosopher: “There is only one constant in life and that is change.”

Nothing stays the same. We are either growing and expanding our experiences and knowledge or shrinking. In other words, if we get caught in the trap of doing the same old habits and routines eventually our influence and enthusiasm will wither away until we are forced to change under pressure and circumstances that we do not like.

Whether it’s staying in a job too long and then getting fired or staying in a miserable relationship until finally the other person ends it: creating changes in your life can at times be scary and overwhelming.

How do we proactively deal with change? I’m not talking about more, better, or different. I’m talking about real change. The type of change that causes you to find or create the job that you love, transform a relationship, or create a level of health that you have never experienced before.

Below is a list of questions that will help you in that process. Don’t just answer them in your head. Take the time to write down the questions and the answers. Doing this will give you more clarity and help you develop the action steps that are necessary in creating that change proactively.

• What are three things in your life that you are doing that you committed to changing?
• What are ten reasons why these three things must change?
• Who are three people that can support you in creating that change?
• Where in your life are you embracing change and where are you running away from it?
• What’s one thing you could do today to face that fear?

The One Constant In Life is a post from: Copyright 2010 Ed Gerety's Dream Big Blog

It was my friend Dave’s birthday and I decided to take him out to breakfast at one of my favorite places: The Hampton Airfield. It’s a great little spot in Hampton, NH where you can eat and watch small planes take off and land. The run way is just a long grass field and going there always reminds me of what it must have been like to fly before major airports and 747’s.

On this particular morning as we sat outside eating there was a giant open cockpit biplane parked right next to us. It was majestic and looked brand new even though it was a vintage aeroplane-1930 new standard. It was an old plane.

Dave and I commented on the beautiful maroon and gold colors that looked as though they had been painted on yesterday.

The woodwork around the cockpit was hand carved and the engine was pristine silver.

It was at that point that Dave looked at me and said, “Hey Ed, I wonder if you can go for a ride on that?”

I said, “I think so but that’s not why I took you here. It was just for breakfast and a chance to celebrate your birthday.”

Dave commented, “But Ed, what a better way to celebrate my birthday than to take a ride on that.”

“I don’t know Dave; I do enough flying on airplanes and besides it looks a little scary.” I replied.

The next thing you know Dave found out who the pilot was and that he could take us for a ride- right now.

Right now! Wait a minute this is happening way too fast. All of this fear and worry came over me about all of the things that could go wrong if I took that plane ride. I came up with a number of reasons and excuses of why I should not get on that biplane.

I was still hesitant and not sure when Dave said to me. “Ed this is a moment. Aren’t you all about creating moments? You will look back on this and wish you had done it.”

Fifteen minutes later Dave and I had on our vintage hats and goggles and we stepped into the open cockpit ready for takeoff.
The pilot took us up and down the New Hampshire seacoast and out over the Atlantic Ocean.

It was a thrill ride and I was so glad that my good friend had encouraged me to create a moment that will stay with the both us forever.

What special moments can you create for another person? What can you celebrate?

Thrill Ride is a post from: Copyright 2010 Ed Gerety's Dream Big Blog

Jump: to take eagerly; to enter into something with vigor

My little girl Shannon is two-and-a-half years old and I just started teaching her how to swim. This basically means me getting into a pool with her while she floats around with a swim bubble strapped to her back. Recently, she has discovered the game of going to the side of the pool and then jumping into my arms. The first time that she did it I could see the fear in her whole body. She was scared, nervous, wondering how I would ever catch her. When she finally did jump and landed into my arms her whole face turned to shear joy and triumph. This game repeated itself for the next twenty minutes. Each time she would get a little less scared and a little more confident. The jumps became bigger and the joy even greater.

(See Video Below)

I can’t help but think how this parallels our own lives. When we are confronted with new things or change is upon us. It can feel scary to step out of our comfort zone and try something new. To put ourselves out there not knowing what will happen or what the result will be. I think that those that don’t jump in life-or in other words take positive risks-are missing out on living an extraordinary life. This blog is a jump for me. I’m not sure who will read it or how will people will respond. But without me sharing it I would never know. Without taking the jumps in life the world doesn’t get to see who you are and you don’t get to see the world.

Where in your life are you holding back? Where are you afraid to make that jump?

Here are three questions to help you make that jump?

1. One week from now, one month from now, and one year from now how will you feel if you didn’t take that positive risk?
2. Who are the people in your life that can support you in taking that risk?
3. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen if you take that risk?

Jump! is a post from: Copyright 2010 Ed Gerety's Dream Big Blog