Ed Gerety’s Dream Big Blog

Jump: to take eagerly; to enter into something with vigor

My little girl Shannon is two-and-a-half years old and I just started teaching her how to swim. This basically means me getting into a pool with her while she floats around with a swim bubble strapped to her back. Recently, she has discovered the game of going to the side of the pool and then jumping into my arms. The first time that she did it I could see the fear in her whole body. She was scared, nervous, wondering how I would ever catch her. When she finally did jump and landed into my arms her whole face turned to shear joy and triumph. This game repeated itself for the next twenty minutes. Each time she would get a little less scared and a little more confident. The jumps became bigger and the joy even greater.

(See Video Below)

I can’t help but think how this parallels our own lives. When we are confronted with new things or change is upon us. It can feel scary to step out of our comfort zone and try something new. To put ourselves out there not knowing what will happen or what the result will be. I think that those that don’t jump in life-or in other words take positive risks-are missing out on living an extraordinary life. This blog is a jump for me. I’m not sure who will read it or how will people will respond. But without me sharing it I would never know. Without taking the jumps in life the world doesn’t get to see who you are and you don’t get to see the world.

Where in your life are you holding back? Where are you afraid to make that jump?

Here are three questions to help you make that jump?

1. One week from now, one month from now, and one year from now how will you feel if you didn’t take that positive risk?
2. Who are the people in your life that can support you in taking that risk?
3. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen if you take that risk?

I just finished reading, “The Last Lecture” by Randy Pausch. If you have
not already read it, it is a must read.

“The Last Lecture” is now one of my top ten favorite books of all time. One of my favorite quotes in the book is, “It’s not about how to achieve your dreams.  It’s about how to lead your life.  If you lead your life the right way, the karma will take care of itself.  The dreams will come to you.”

When I think of the magical moments of my life and dreams that have come true I can see that there was nothing forced or controlled.  I allowed the moment or the event to unfold naturally. I was present and patient with what was happening and danced in the conversation. That’s not to say that I did not work hard and had to overcome obstacles. I think that’s what Randy Pausch meant when he said, “The dreams will come to you.”

As children our dreams are never about fixing or changing things. Rather they are about creating, exploring, and having fun. As we get older we sometimes forget that. When was the last time that you made a list of your dreams? Not a big “to-do” list or a “what I want to accomplish list” but a real child-like dream list. A dream list filled with fun, play, and adventure.

Here are some dreams are on my list:

• Throw out an opening pitch at Fenway Park
• Take a 7-day white water rafting trip down the Colorado River
• Ride on Air Force One
• Golf with Tiger Woods and my two brothers
• Vacations to Italy, Ireland, and Napa Valley

Dream Big!

P.S. What’s on your list?  I invite you to share some here in the comments below.

I had the opportunity to present a four hour leadership training in San Francisco, California this past Sunday to an elite group of student- athletes representing every school in the PAC 10 conference.

It was inspiring to be in a room filled with NCAA champions, Olympians, and future professional athletes. The focus of the training was to teach them the principles and skills that are essential to being an effective leader. During one of the breaks, one of the student -athletes came up to me and asked me the following question.

“Ed, what if you are afraid of sharing your goal/dream with others?” I thought the question was a surprising one considering the level of success she had already achieved in and out of her sport. In talking with her it occurred to me that no matter how much we have accomplished in life, when we dream and set a big goal for ourselves, the thought of sharing it with others can be scary. You start to ask yourself questions like what if they say it’s not possible, what if they laugh at us, what if they hold us accountable?

I don’t think we have to share are goals/dreams with the world or share it on Facebook or Twitter. However, I do think that we should share it with at least a trusted friend, partner, or coach. In doing so that person can support us, encourage us, and in many cases provide resources to help us in achieving our goal. When we don’t, I think it gives us an opportunity to play it safe and we don’t give ourselves an opportunity to go farther than we may think we can. It’s Ok to be nervous even scared when we are setting a big goal for ourselves. It means that you are really up to playing big in the game of life.

What big goal or dream do you have that makes you a little scared/nervous?

What is the last big goal/dream of yours that you have shared with a trusted friend, partner, or coach?

One of my passions is reading great books on leadership and peak performance. I love to learn about how individuals and organizations are able to overcome challenges and produce extraordinary results. My new favorite book is by Steve Zaffron and Dave Logan titled, The Three Laws of Performance: Rewriting the Future of Your Organization and Your Life (J-B Warren Bennis Series). The book is inspiring and well – just awesome. Here’s why. What makes this book unique is that it does not give you steps, strategies, or secret tips about success. It is a hands-on practical approach to living an extraordinary life with real life examples.

A key insight in the book is that it is so easy to get caught up in the game of trying to fix the things that are not working in your life and the more that you try to fix them the more concrete and fixed they become. This pattern becomes a “probable predictable future” that leaves you frustrated and operating at a performance level way below your potential.

In my keynote presentations one of the messages I share is how important it is to focus on the positive and what’s possible. That what we think about, we become. Whether you call it the “law of attraction”, “manifesting your destiny”, or “the secret” it is a universal principle about focus and energy. What this book does a great job of doing is taking this point to a higher level of understanding and a deeper meaning. In the book the authors talk about how what you “resist in life persists” meaning the more you avoid or suppress something the more energy and attention you give to it. Thus, leading to more of what you don’t want.

Another great insight in the book is that our access to power, freedom, and true self expression lies in creating a new future that is filled with possibility. This possibility is created through understanding and having compassion for how the world “occurs” to the people around us. It is this compassion along with using “generative language” that leads to us creating a new future at a level of performance that may have never before seemed possible.

How do you create that compassion? I believe that compassion comes from remembering that we don’t know everything about anyone. Real compassion comes from listening, understanding, and respecting what makes us different. It is at the heart of not only a new level performance but an extraordinary life.

I went away for a few days with my family up to North Conway, NH in
the White Mountains. While I was there I took some time to go skiing.
It’s one of my favorite activities to do and it always re-energizes me
and helps me look at my life from a different perspective.  I was
reminded on this trip that it is just as important to play hard as it
is to work hard; to carve out that time in my life to do the things
that I am passionate about and to do the things that I love to do.  I
find that when I do that I am not only re-energized but inspired and
present to what really matters in my life.

Life can get busy with all of the responsibilities that we have and
the things that we “have” to do. It’s easy to say that one day when
all my work is done I will then do the things I love to do. There will
always be work to do and things that have to get done.

There is no someday. We never know how our life will change from one
day to the next. Whether it’s the unexpected loss of a loved one, a
change in our health, our job, or even where we live.

Start doing the things that you love to do right now!  It’s not only
how you create balance in your life it’s how you create an
extraordinary life.

Going into a new year I am always excited about the new goals that I have planned that I sometimes have the tendency to create high expectations of how things will turn out. It almost happened last week when I took my four-year-old son Ryan skiing for the first time. We were both so excited and I was ready for a long fun-filled day on the slopes.

Once his skis were on we proceeded to the “beginner hill”. I enthusiastically began to teach Ryan about “french fries and apple pie” which is an easy way to remember how to position your skis. French fries for keeping the skis straight and apple pie for making the shape to snow plow down the hill.

The lesson ended after about five minutes as Ryan became more interested about when we could go up the giant chairlift, on why he could not have his own ski poles, and when could he ski really fast by himself.

It was at that moment I could feel myself becoming frustrated because this was not the way that I thought his first time skiing should go. I expected it to be easier and never thought of the work out I would get from continually picking him up and putting his skis back on. I realized I had set up this high expectation of what our day together skiing would look like. It was at that moment that I stopped and said to myself, “let the expectation go, everything is happening just the way it’s supposed to.”

Our remaining time on the mountain involved me picking him up, answering questions, and lots of laughing. After only a half an hour outside he declared he was done for the day and that it was time for hot chocolate. Perfect.

If I had not caught myself on the slopes that day with him I could have made the whole experience a miserable one for me and most of all Ryan. It’s a great lesson for all of us to remember as we go into a new year filled with possibilities.

It’s important to dream big, clearly set your goals, and to take action in achieving them. But none of that really matters if our expectations are set so high that we never get to truly enjoy what we are experiencing and what we have accomplished. To make 2009 the best that it can be I think you have to go into each day with no expectations. When you do that you not only don’t force things to go a certain way, you also are able to relax, be in the moment and have more fun.

http://snipurl.com/7s4fy

Our son Ryan is turning four years old next week. It’s amazing how
quickly the four years have gone by and how our baby is now our little
boy.

This got me thinking about just how powerful the number 4 is. It
takes four years to graduate from high school and look how much
changes from when you start out as a freshman to when you become a
senior and graduate. I went to college for four years and the
friendships, experiences, and lessons learned in those 4 years
impacted my life forever.

When I look at the personal and professional goals that I set for
myself the majority of them are set in the increments of 4. What are
my goals for the next 4 weeks? What are my goals for the next 4
months? And what are my goals for the next 4 years?

How much has your life changed in 4 years? How much has it changed
over the past four seasons?

Because four is a fantastic number and to celebrate our son turning
this special number I’m making my book, “Combinations: Opening the
Door to Student Leadership” available for $4. per copy *plus shipping.

So I invite you to celebrate with us! You can order as many books as
you like. You can order 1, 4 or even 400!

It’s a great gift to give someone for the holidays or a great way to
reward your students and inspire them to keep reaching for their goals
as we go into 2009.

I will gladly sign each copy as well.

Thanks for reading. This offer will end Friday December 19th. After
that it will be gone 4-ever.

Here is where you can order your copy:

http://snipurl.com/7s4fy

Watch This Video:

I had been speaking at several high schools in the Freeport, Maine
area encouraging students to live and lead their life with respect,
responsibility, and to find and follow their passion. It was
coincidental that during my visit to the headquarters of L.L. Bean I
discovered that is how this company was created.

Question:  Can you turn what you love to do into your life’s work?
Your career?  Your legacy?

It is my observation that those people who live an extraordinary life
do just that.  The L.L. Bean story is another example of someone
following their passions and creating a life around what they love to
do.
The challenge is to take the time to reflect and to explore what goals
and dreams you can build around what you are passionate about.  Then
take action and do it!

I was in Cody, WY because I had the great privilege of being the keynote speaker at the 53rd annual Wyoming Association of Student Councils State Conference. The chamber of commerce says, “Cody, WY is a small western town with a big city attitude.” Cody also calls itself the “Rodeo Capital of the World”.

Capture Life’s Moments!

A special note about this video shot at Cannon Beach, OR: I didn’t know at the time when I was shooting this that Haystack Rock can be seen in the opening and closing scene of “The Goonies”
(A 1985 adventure-comedy movie that is one of my all time favorite movies) *All the more reason to capture life’s moments because you never know what you will learn and discover.